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I am not a doctor, but its sound like you might be suffering Post Traumatic Stress, and should seek professional help to rule it out or get treatment. You should be concerned about the 10 critical accidents (I read critical that as hospital/doctors visits and time off school/work, not a mere "off" ). You are likely riding beyond you limits, and need to ...


I also like speed and racing, but after some close calls (nowhere close to yours) I decided to push my limits going UPHILL, go faster in that 17% climb where 10 mph is the speed of light. And outside of bicycles, there are infinite challenges, running a mile under 5 minutes, learning to swim butterfly, or in strength training, going for the gimnastic ...

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