The one thing I always say to people in your situation is to remember that we have all been there. And the saving grace here is that by the time you get to buy your second bike, you will know exactly what to look for. With that in mind, you might want to think about limiting what you spend on your first bike.
But for the moment...
For your suspension and comfort on uneven roads, I would urge you to talk to other cyclists in your vicinity. Are they riding "regular" road bikes? Or are they riding bikes like cyclocross (CX) bikes to take account of the imperfect surfaces? For example, I live in the New Forest and ride a couple of road bikes, one audax and one out-and-out racing bike, with no problem on the road surfaces down here. I have been up to Yorkshire a few times and the surfaces didn't particularly strike me as any worse than the surfaces I ride. I just think that people who are already riding these roads might be able to help you, I'm sure they'd be happy if you stopped them and asked (as long as you did so sensibly I suppose!).....I certainly wouldn't.
Within the road bike genre, there are obviously many different styles of bike. As I say, one of my bikes is an audax bike. Audaxes are road events that are long (can be hundreds of km), so whilst they are still road bikes, they're built so the rider will be comfortable in the saddle for several hours. They also take place in the winter, so bikes will usually have things like mudguards, also I fitted a rack to mine to go touring with panniers, so something like that may be an option for you.
If you're feeling more adventurous, in professional cycling there are a series of races early on in the season (called the Spring Classics), which are held in Belgium/Holland in March/April time of year. So basically, before the weather is warm. The conditions of these races can be quite challenging. The riders will often ride bikes that, whilst still racing bikes, are designed for slightly more rugged conditions. Much like a Yorkshire August, I suspect!! But there may be some value in looking on a couple of cycling web sites at some of the bikes that are ridden in these races, to give you a heads-up on what to shop for. (Of course it depends on your budget, but many of the bike designs are affordable to the general masses, although possibly with lesser frame materials and/or components.)
But please, the single best piece of advice is to test the bike before you buy it.