I recently replaced my hybrid road tires w tires a bit more knobby. Not gravel tires, but not smooth. Anyway, ordering online I got the suggested tubes that are super skinny. While they fit, they don't really fill the tire. Worse, the grip on the road is so poor. Questioning if I should buy wider tubes or are the tires crap??
If the tube doesn't explode inside the tyre, you can use it but it may naturally leak air fast and be more prone to punctures. Theoretically there might be a risk in boundary cases where the tube doesn't explode immediately but could rapidly explode and deflate while in use, but I suspect those cases are rare. Besides, a tube that explodes for example due to a tire sidewall cut that makes a very loud bang, won't cause you to crash, you can stop gradually and fix the issue. So the hazard isn't major.
I always purchase the largest tube I can fit inside the tire. On my 28mm Conti GP5000 tires, that's either Schwalbe 28/47 or Continental 32/47. The Continental is nominally a bit too large, but I have found I can straighten the wrinkles with little effort and it will eventually fit.
If your tubes are too small, the failure mode is that they puncture too easily and leak too fast. On my 28mm GP5000 tires, with large tubes I need to pump them up every 2 weeks. If you have too small tubes and use similar high-pressure tires, you may find you need to pump them every 1 week for example.
If I were you, I would purchase few much larger tubes, and then the next time I have to take the tire away from the rim, put a larger tube in. Carry a larger spare in your emergency tool kit too in case of on-the-road punctures. In the meantime, before replacing the tubes, pump the tires up to full pressure twice as often as you would otherwise do.